A Weekend of Good-byes

My weekend of good-byes is now over. Thank God, because I'm not sure I could really take more good-byes. I had a hard enough time keeping control my tear ducts as it was.

Friday was my last day with Homeward Bound and work. I got off work on Friday morning and went to Homeward Bound for my last morning of cleaning dog kennels and feeding said dogs. One of the volunteers had brought a carrot cake, some muffins, and donuts for us all to eat after our hard work. I am sorry to say good-bye to the organization, and Jody (who runs it). Not to mention some of the dogs that are lifers, and saw every week for years.  I managed to not cry, although while driving away for the last time it was very hard.

My last night at work was just like any other night at work. We had a potluck for me. A new hire started that night, as well. And my boss decided not to show up until 1:30am, and the new girl showed up at midnight. Since no management was there (I mean, none at all), it fell on me being the senior tech to sit her down and start her reading SOP's (standard operating procedures) for the bench she would start training on. I clocked out at 7am, for the last time, and took my badge to my boss. She took it, and said, "This makes it real. You do know that you will be missed, right?" Of course I knew that. She stood up to give me a hug, and then I went back through the lab for another 30 minutes or so of good-byes.

So many people that I will no longer see every day. Or night, rather. I left the building at 7:45, for the last time. I got in my car, and it hit me. All those people that I have seen for 40 hours every week (sometimes more), and I won't see them again. And if I do, it won't be for a long time. I will miss them all. Okay, most of them. I won't have to hear people hollering my name to come fix a machine. I won't have any more shouting matches with my boss. I won't get to obsess about Pride & Prejudice stuff with my equally obsessed co-worker. I won't be eating my lunch at 2:30am anymore.

I drove out to Saddle Pals a couple hours later that same morning. It was to be my last Saturday with them. The instructor had brought a small cake and some cupcakes for my good-bye. After my first lesson, I put Tex (favorite horse there) out to pasture for the day. I nearly lost it, saying good-bye to a horse. Slightly pathetic, yes. But if you knew this horse, you'd be sad to leave him, too. I managed to sneak a picture of us, before I left his pasture. After lessons, I took a picture with the two gals I see every week there. After saying all kinds of good-byes, I climbed in my car, and immediately had to pull out the tissues. I cried most of the way home.

With Dudley before a lesson.

Later I was texting my mom and I said that I hadn't really realized how many people I would be saying good-bye to. She replied with, "I knew!" You think she could have told me, right?

My BFF showed up a little after 3pm that day. We chit-chatted until it was time to go to my belated birthday/send off dinner. I was expecting about 8 people at least. And like every other time I have a birthday get together, most don't show. My BFF was there, as were my friends ST and HS and her boyfriend. We still had a wonderful time. After dinner, my BFF and I went to Rick's Dessert Diner in downtown Sac. I abhor downtown Sac and avoid it whenever possible. However, my BFF loved this place and wanted me to experience it before I left Sacramento. It was definitely worth the wait in line. I bought a piece of cheesecake and I think it's the best I've ever eaten. It was delicious.

We eventually hit the hay sometime around midnight, and I was exhausted, having been up for about 30 hours. We both slept in late on Sunday morning, and felt like slugs, so we stayed on the couch just talking. She finally left in the late afternoon.

When I said earlier that I didn't realize that I had so many people to say good-bye to, I was serious. I am kind of a homebody, although I do like to get out once in awhile. For lots of reasons, I don't have much a life in Sacramento. Partly because of my hours, partly because I'm a homebody, and partly because I'm shy. But once I had to start saying good-bye to people, I realized that I do know lots of people down here. Many I consider friends. And many I am sad to leave, not knowing when I may see them again.

And while I am sad to leave the people, I will not be sad to leave Sacramento. Or my job. While it was a good job, it was never what I really wanted to do. I never wanted to be a lab rat. And that's exactly what I became. I learned a lot by working there, things I never would have thought I would know. But I am glad to say that I am no longer an employee. In regards to to the city - I am not a city girl. While I like some things a city can offer, and I enjoy visiting sometimes, I do not enjoy living in it.

My BFF and I had this very conversation. I asked her yesterday, "Does it ever amaze you sometimes how we are best friends? We are polar opposites in so many ways!" She laughed and agreed. She is a city girl through and through, while I am a country girl, amongst other things.

On Saturday, I will be moving into my new place in Sticksville, USA. I am excited to begin my new life there. I am still nervous and scared. But everyone I know, in real life and in the blogoshpere, has been so supportive and wonderful, that I know I have made the right choice. 

And the best part about this last weekend? I actually slept laying down for the first time in two weeks. That means my horrendous cough is improving! I awoke on my side, all curled up, which I haven't been able to do since this cough started. Oh thank God for the little things.

With Tex, my main man.

Forgive Me. And My Absent Ways.

I'm so neglectful.

Okay. Not really. It's more like I have too much to do and not enough time to do it in. Not to mention my cough set me back nearly a week. Do you know how tiring coughing is? Especially when it prevents sleep for at least two days??? I finally dragged my ass to the doctor to get my some cough syrup. With Codeine. My bestest buddy ever. Took all I had on Tuesday to not drink the entire bottle so I could some rest. I settled for the two teaspoons. Promptly knocking my ass out.

Anyway, while being sick, I was enraptured with books. My co-worker who is just as Pride & Prejudice obsesses as I am, has been loaning me books continuing the story. I think I've mentioned them. Anyway, I had to finish the second one she gave me. I will probably need to buy them for myself as I had the hardest time putting them down. (I think I may require professional help . . . )

Therefore, because I was obsessed and sick, I have not read a single blog for nearly a week. I have so many to catch up on. Which probably won't be until Sunday night or Monday at the earliest. So, please forgive my sorry obsessive ass for not reading and commenting on all your blogs. I beg your forgiveness.  Not to mention I haven't really written in the way of blogs for the week, either.

Today was my last day at Homeward Bound. If you're a newer follower and don't know about Homeward Bound, I have a button to the left. After cleaning up after 40 dogs (at least), one of the volunteers had brought carrot cake, some bagels, and donuts. Jody, the owner, myself and other volunteers enjoyed some food (after washing our hands thoroughly!!) and took a break from working. Several hugs were given, and I held back the tears. I nearly cried as I drove away, looking back on the property as I drove away.

Tonight is my last night at work. My co-workers are having a potluck for me. And tomorrow is my last day at Saddle Pals (also a button to the left, if you haven't read previous blogs about them). I have too many lasts coming at me!

So please, forgive me for my being absent for a few more days. Once this weekend is over, I shall have a few more spare minutes to catch up on blogs and commenting. I shall return, I swear!

By the way . . . have I mentioned this yet:

I have one more night of work left!!!!! Please picture the biggest, goofiest grin a person can have on their face.

Literally.

Half-Assed Weekend

Not to rub this in to the poor folks freezing to death in snow banks, but I enjoyed a good portion of a 70 degree day. I spent my morning at Saddle Pals after work, and got out early from that to run a few errands before finally getting home to be able to open my windows and air out my place. Seriously. It gets stuffy in here keeping the windows closed all winter. My cat is currently sleeping in my room with the sunlight pouring on her. She's happy.

I only get one day off (that would be today), and I'm back to work on Sunday night. Yay for me. (rolls eyes dramatically)

I found out this morning that one of my favorite horses at SP, Rio, is being officially retired. I mean that literally, not "figuratively". He's 30 years old, and for a horse, that is old. His eyesight is starting to go and he's taken a couple of spills. I'll be sad to see him go, he's such a sweet old horse. 

I went to Target today to pick up a few items. I saw the most patient mother ever. Her toddler was just so excited and running around pointing at things. He ran to the tea and yelled, "TEEEEAAAA!!" His mom replied, "You really like that one, don't you?" She just followed him around the store while she shopped, saying, "Wow, that's cool", "What did I say? Walk please", "Remember, no running", "Wait for mommy, sweetie".  On my way to the checkout I saw a different mother with the opposite style. All I heard was, "Yeah, let's go ahead and cry in Target. Let's go ahead and cause a scene. That would be great. And you're the oldest. That's just great." At least the parents that shop at Target "parent" their kids. As opposed to the ones I see in Wal-Mart . . . because they don't.

My mom and I had the funniest texting conversation this afternoon:

Mom: OMG! Why does this ALWAYS happen to me? The biggest butt crack ever!

Me: Um, what?

Mom:  Oh it was disgusting.....and IN the grocery store!

Me: LMAO!!

Mom: omg! Fat guy....funny blue pants buttoned under his fat belly and a red shirt too short for his belly! After he left the checker started singing "I'm too sexy for my shirt". I laughed and said  "you should have been in the soup isle!"

Me:  LMAO Niiiice.

Obviously her portion of the conversation involved real words. I was too busy laughing my ass off at her expense.

 

 

Hi, Boss? Here's my two month's notice . . .

It's now officially official - I've given notice to everyone. Well, except my apartment, but that will come just after the holidays.

If you missed my rant on the anonymous jackwagon that leaked out to management about my leaving, please click here.

My supervisor asked to speak with me on Wednesday night, turns out, it was regarding this "rumor" she had heard. I sat down, and told her everything . . . well, not about my blog or anything, but that the rumor was true. She blamed Facebook; the fact that I put everything on Facebook seemed to be the evil factor in all of this. Anyway, she was rather Zen about it. She was totally fine with it. I think she was more worried that I was uncomfortable talking to her, which wasn't he case. After working there for six years, I sorta figured I'd get the "You're leaving me?" line, but other than that, I was just planning on waiting until after the holidays.

Turns out, another gal put in her notice the same night. My poor supervisor.

I've told my volunteer gigs, as well. At Saddle Pals, they were shocked and wanted to know all the gory details. And the instructor told me I couldn't leave until February 18th, as that's the last day of the next session. Another gal at Saddle Pals told me that if I needed any help whatsoever, to call her and she'd be there in an instant. I told her I will welcome any and all friendly faces that wish to come visit me in Sticksville, USA.

At Homeward Bound, Jody (the gal who runs it), was so excited for me, she hugged me. Two other volunteers that were there heard everything as well, and were both excited for me. Jody has heard me talk of the ranch before, and knows how much I love it up there, and knows that that is where I wish to be. She also has requested I send her pictures.

As scared as I am of this huge shift in my life, I'm welcoming it. All of the support has been overwhelming. My family, though a bit shocked by my announcement at Thanksgiving, gave me wishes of good luck and encouragement. My best friend, while fully understanding my dislike of being 8 hours away from her instead of 2, knows I'm not a city girl and has assured me that nothing will ever change between us. My co-workers have all wished me well, and know that I am moving on and up in my life and only want to stay in touch. Several have offered their homes to me as my hotel when I come to visit. While I fear I will fall on my face in a big steaming pile of cow shit, I wonder if I can ever fail if I'm supported by so many?

The votes were unanimous in my going up there. Not a single person said I was wrong for even considering it. Those who know me know that I don't like city life. Sacramento is 400,00 people. That's about 350,000 more than I'm comfortable with. Even my boss was supportive and answered questions I had about my 401k or my vacation time that will be paid out. Every single person I know that spoke out, whether on Facebook or my wonderful peeps in the blogoshpere, showed me nothing but love and support.

I want to thank each and every one of you for your support. While I'm sure I would have made the same decision even if all the naysayers showed up, I'm so thankful that none of them did.

After 6.5 years, I'm finally getting myself a day job.

Volunteer Appreciation

Today, I went to a picnic at Homeward Bound that was put on by the two founders for their volunteers. It's two hours out of the entire year that the volunteers come together to thank each other for their help. It's two hours that the founders get to thank so many volunteers at once. Some of the volunteers are close friends, having been with Homeward Bound for several years. You hear them talking "shop" while eating. You see a dozen or more dogs that were once homeless and scared, now playing fetch or wading in the doggie pools, or even catching some shade under a table (and hopefully a piece of yummy Tri-Tip).

Until you go to a picnic, it's hard to understand just how many people give their time to such an organization. Being the only Golden Retriever rescue in the state of California, Homeward Bound gets dogs from literally all over. There are people who "taxi" dogs from one end of the state to the other, in a sort of relay. Every dog is seen by a veterinarian who donates her time and makes it possible for Homeward Bound to take in, quite literally, any Golden in any condition or of any age. There are the dog walkers. There's the dog groomer who donates her time. There are those that assist in facility maintenance. There are those that clean the kennels and feed the dogs (like me). There are those that help place dogs in homes, help possible adopters find the right dog for their families.

I go there one day a week. I see, maybe three or four other volunteers on that day. I'm a small fish in a very big pond, and until this picnic comes along once a year, it's hard to imagine how many others are out there. It's also hard to imagine how many dogs you've helped save, even when giving a few hours, one day a week.

Last year, Homeward Bound took in nearly 900 dogs. Partly due to the housing crisis. Partly due to horrific back yard breeders. Either way, that's a lot of dogs that were once homeless.


The dogs that people brought today were once part of that. Instead of being fearful and hungry, they are now thriving, happy Goldens who know no fear. It's an honor to help Homeward Bound find these adorable creatures new lives and new homes. And I am only one of hundreds of strangers who give their time. For one cause:

The dogs.

Forced donating

A couple weeks ago, I wrote about the donation fiasco that I dealt with regarding my job's annual United Way campaign. My department's fundraiser is Thursday night, and I'm already feeling the pressure.

Last week, no one bothered me for much. Another department did a bake sale, and I offered to bake some cookies and muffins. I told the head guy that those would be my donations to United Way, seeing as how I can't even part with $5 as my bills are much more important. He was totally fine with that.

This week, however, is my department's turn. We're doing a Salsa Cook-off and Nacho Bar. I was planning on making salsa, as that's easy enough to do and let that be my donation. I won't be doing that anymore. The nacho thing got added Monday night as the salsa cook-off alone isn't a very big fundraiser. They charge per vote and per taste-test. You can choose a small nacho container or a large nacho container. And we're even making virgin margaritas for an additional cost. And at the last minute, my boss decides to charge an entrance fee for the salsa cook-off. I have to pay $3 just to put a bowl of salsa out for others to taste. Hell no.

What sucks is this: I love nachos. This is positively killing me.

Not to mention, while I was on lunch last night, my boss and two others were in the break room discussing our event. This was when I found out all these "donation" charges. As I'm sitting at my own table, eating my chili and garlic bread, my boss goes on and on about how she expects everyone to participate. Meaning, the nacho sign-up sheet that doesn't have my name it on . . . I could possibly get hell for that. When I don't have a bowl of salsa on the table, I could get hell for that. When I don't show up with my paycheck to donate all the money their looking for, I could get hell for that. She wants so hard to beat the other department who raised nearly $600 from their bake sale, because why? The department who earns the most money gets pizza.

I have nowhere to hide on Thursday night. It supposed to start at 1AM, and I don't go to lunch until 2:30AM. I have already refused to bring anything for the nacho bar, considering I'm not eating any of it, nor am I donating money to eat it. I'm not sure if my boss has caught wind yet of the fact that my name is not on that sign up sheet.

I know I'm within my rights to not donate for whatever my personal reasons are. But sometimes, others just don't understand - whether it's a can't or won't, I'm not entirely sure. I may not be destitute, but I need all I can get. If I have a couple extra bucks and decide to let loose once, I treat myself cheaply, like a $3 meal from McD's, or a $2 meal from Taco Bell. But that's at my discretion.

I know I'm a good person because I volunteer for my two organizations with my time. But I'm really starting to feel like a chump for not being able to give money to United Way. Especially with my boss hollering around the lab how she expects everyone to be buying salsa votes and nachos. I know I shouldn't feel bad, but I do. And I hate that.

Volunteering, it's good for the soul

Now that I've calmed down a bit from my rant on what happened last night at work, I wanted to share my volunteer gigs with ya'll. (Actually, I'm still rather upset about it all, but my Mom, Jewels, and Cinderita are right - I have my priorities, and donations are supposed to be given willingly). I think doing something for your community is important. Even if it's small. When I was little, growing up in Old Station (Read: Home again, home again jiggity jig), my parents were volunteer EMT's. It was a tiny town, and in such towns, most things are volunteer - like the firefighters and EMT's who could save your house or your life. In larger towns and cities, people volunteer for Humane Societies, Salvation Army, etc. There are so many things in life that run on volunteer efforts; people who willingly sacrifice their time to help someone or something. And they don't consider it a sacrifice, they consider it a privilege.

I'd been in Sacramento for a couple years at least before I decided to volunteer. I went to a website (found it off Google), and it listed organizations looking for volunteers for certain jobs. All I knew was that I wanted to work with animals, since I no longer do in my current job. I found a couple ads that interested me. One was for Homeward Bound Golden Retriever Rescue, and the other for Saddle Pals Therapeutic Riding Center.

Homeward Bound was founded by a couple named Jody & Mike about 10 years ago. It's their life. Night and day. Jody tells me about the nights she'll sleep in the barn on the futon if she has a sick dog. Mike constantly works on projects - fencing, pens, etc. It's run completely by volunteers, and it's all for the dogs. They try to save as many dogs as they possibly can, and it tears them up when they can't. The recent economy and housing crash hit pretty hard last year. They rescued well over 800 dogs, and their vet bills are nearing $400,00/year. Some dogs have been there since I started in May of 2008. Most aren't, thank goodness. Most have found homes, whether it be foster or adopted. Some are "Sanctuary Goldens" meaning they will live their life at Homeward Bound because their seniors or have severe medical issues. They have yet to turn a single dog away, not even Cooper who was a Pit Bull. Or the few Labradoodles that have come in. Or the one that looked more like a Corgi than a Golden. Every week, I go in on Friday mornings after work, and I help Jody clean the kennels and feed the dogs. There are 30 kennels, at least three of those are large enough to comfortably fit two or three dogs if they came from the same household. When the housing crisis hit, and many owners were facing foreclosure, the influx hit. Suddenly we not only had the 30 regular kennels to clean and feed, we had dozens of crates in the main aisle, some double stacked. And out in the barn area were more kennels, again, in some cases, double stacked. It's the only Golden Rescue in the state of CA, and they have a volunteer network that shuttles dogs from San Diego to Sacramento. They have even gotten dogs shipped from Asia! Even though the kennels are loud with the dogs incessant barking, just looking in those dark brown eyes, you see they still just want your lovin'. To learn more about Homeward Bound, I invite you to visit their website:
http://www.homewardboundgoldens.org

Left: Looking longways down the kennel during a "busy time" during the foreclosure crisis. Right, by on the of the kennel entrances, more dogs.







Saddle Pals is a part of United Cerebral Palsy (or UCP) of Greater Sacramento, and offers horseback riding lessons for people with developmental disabilities, from small children to adults. I work on Saturday mornings for about 3 hours; I'm a "leader", meaning I lead a horse in a lesson, and I'm in charge of the horse, making sure it's safe for the rider at all times. Most riders require at least one side walker, a person who walks right next to the horse, making sure the rider is safe and follows instructions. Some kids require two side walkers, some are independent enough they don't require a side walker at all. Some lessons are private, others have two or three students in a lesson. I confess one of the major reasons I wanted to volunteer with Saddle Pals was the horses. I have been a horse lover as long as I can remember. I owned my own until I moved away from home for college, and don't get to be around them much anymore. However, after getting to know the kids in my lessons, I grew to love them just as much as the horses. One girl, "T" is legally blind, yet rides independently. The first time I saw this, I was more impressed than words can say. There is a volunteer in each corner of the arena, and serve as "talking cones"; they're assigned a number/letter and as she comes toward them, they repeat it until she passes. She's nearly my age and has been riding since she was a teenager. Another girl, "K" is one smart cookie trapped inside a body that refuses to listen to her. She works so hard and in the two years I've been there, she has improved a great deal. She's moved on to using a saddle and stirrups. When I first started with her, it was hard for to vocalize "Walk On" for her horse, I often had to look for her hand signal. Now, she never uses her hand signal, but says fairly clearly - "Walk On". And it's adorable when she tries to impress her family from out of town. Other kids teach more patience than anything; if you get frustrated then they get frustrated and can't or won't work. It amazes me every day how hard the kids try. And it amazes me what the horses put up with. I have my favorites, of course. Tex is my man, a gorgeous Quarter Horse with a sweet temper. Rio is my old Stud Muffin, who is just about as old I am, and that is an old horse. Tiny, who is a Belgian Draft and incidentally, the largest horse in the barn is a big cuddly teddy bear who is also afraid of water (mainly sprinklers). Dudley is my "Mr. Pokey", and also gave me my only kiss for Valentine's Day this year (which made "K" laugh during her lesson). Niner is sweet, but can't be without Angie, her gossip buddy. Angie's the biter. Sandman is just a sweet ol' guy who apparently doesn't like wind. And then there's CR, who's name is C.R. Appy (and what does that spell?), he is slower than molasses moving uphill in the middle of winter, and he headbutts a lot. But, I love them all - their sweetness and patience. To learn more about UCP of Sacramento and Saddle Pals, I invite you to visit their website:
http://www.ucpsacto.org/saddle-pals.htm

Left is Tex, and Right is Rio.

Don't make me go all psycho-crazy-white-girl on your ass.

So, last night my job started it's annual United Way campaign. Normally I'm more than happy to participate in the events that interest me, donating a few dollars here and there. However, this year, money is a lot tighter than usual, and I'm on a pretty strict budget, with very little wiggle room. I was even going to make a pasta salad for last night's "Build you own salad bar" event, but I didn't have enough money to purchase all of the ingredients. It's not something I make usually, so I don't really have all the ingredients on hand. I told the head guy for the campaign the issue and he had no issues with it, he understood. I did offer to help at the bake sale in a couple weeks as I always have stuff on hand for baking because I prefer baking to cooking any day.

If only management understood like everyone else did. (sigh)

So last night was the "Build your own salad bar", and you could pay $3 or $6 for small/large salad things, plus byu raffle tickets. Now, most people would say, "I can handle $3!" And yes, I can handle that, but I'm very picky about my money these days. I went to lunch before the salad bar opened, and ate in the car in case they started it and started hounding me to participate. I come back and that's when it starts. I hear on the intercom that it's now open. I stay in the lab, working away. My boss comes back in and asks if I'm going to go eat, and I said, I didn't have any extra cash until payday. She says, "We take IOU's". Really? You want to take IOU's for a charity???? I really don't want to "donate" via IOU and not have the cash when you come to collect in 8 weeks. Besides, this thing is going for 8 weeks. I'm not giving money every single week. Towards the end of the night, the other department's supervisor walks up to me and says, "You can draw the raffle ticket since you didn't want to participate."

Excuse me?

I draw the raffle ticket, giving my apparently lame-o excuse, and she repeats what my supervisor said, "We take IOU's". I simply stated I'll have money come payday, and that's when I'll donate.

This just continues to bug me for the rest of my shift. Are they trying to imply that I'm a bad person for not donating money I can't really part with at the moment? I'm sorry, my rent and car payment is way more important to me that United Way. I'm sure United Way would understand. Times are tough. But they shouldn't make me feel bad. Even though I can't give money, I give in other ways. I volunteer on Fridays for a Golden Retriever Rescue, helping feed and clean the kennels. On Saturdays I volunteer for a Therapeutic Riding organization called Saddle Pals through UCP for disabled children. I can't afford to give money, but I can afford to give my time and little bit of gas. So, just because I can't afford a few bucks every week for 8 weeks, does not mean I'm a bad person. I work hard, and I give back to this community.

So back off, bitch.