Does anyone want to know the most annoying sound in the universe?
It's not that horrific sound Jim Carey and Jeff Daniels make in Dumb and Dumber.
I have been job hunting since March. I've had two job interviews in three months. Two weeks ago, one of the three staffing agencies I'm signed up with called me and asked if I'd be interested in a potential job. I said yes (duh), and she put my resume in the pot. She called me a week later to tell me that I hadn't been chosen. (sigh)
I search online for jobs a few times a week. I apply for retail jobs, clerical jobs, part-time and full-time. I apply for weekend only positions, and anything that doesn't require a phlebotomist license and a medical billing/coder degree. I apply for jobs I see in the paper.
My parents check online for jobs for me every couple of days and the paper every day.
And in the three months of job hunting and countless (read: couple hundred) applications I have sent in, only TWO have called me for interviews.
And one of those that called me for an interview wanted to badly to give me a job - 5 hours a week for minimum wage.
Are you fucking kidding me?!
I am frustrated. I am pissed. I am annoyed. I am hurt. I am perturbed. I am irked. I am upset. I am miffed. I am fuming. I am offended.
I. Am. Tired.
How do people keep this going for months, or heaven forbid, years? How? My money is pretty much gone. And if not for the kindness of my parents, I'd be homeless. Unemployment didn't pay that much, and them assholes cut me off because they didn't believe me that we lost our mail distribution center (they say it only takes three days from mail to from Redding to where ever the hell they are and in reality, it takes 10 days. TEN.) and my stuff was always late because of it. But it can't be the mail, it must be me.
I am so tired of job hunting. Of constantly entering the same information over and over and over. And over. I'm tired of uploading my resume to "fill in the application" and it gets most of it wrong so I have to correct it. I'm tired of the fact that in this day and age, you rarely have a person to contact regarding your application because businesses prefer you to apply online. I'm tired of the online assessment tests. I'm tired of having to create a "log in" for every single business I apply to because they each have their own website or they use some random third party place and I have to "register" in order to apply for the damn job. I'm tired of applying for jobs I know I can do but can't get a call back on.
Most of all, I'm tired of being tired. I'm tired of being worried - constantly worried about money. I'm tired of losing sleep - knowing my part-time job is only temporary for the busy wedding season (so through September at best) and the end of wedding season is looming, even though it only just began a month ago. I'm tired of wondering what I'm going to do if I still haven't found another job.
Don't get me wrong, I'm thankful for my cousin for getting me part-time work and trying to keep me close to 20 hours a week. I'm thankful for him putting up with me at work most days of the week. I'm also thankful he gave Boyfriend a job doing deliveries and pick-ups. I'm glad to have a job to go to; something to go do for a few hours every day. But it will end at some point. And some point is just a few short months away.
I'm angry and tired. And I'm tired of feeling that way.