It's Official - I'm Crazy!

I hope that everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving! I've been away from my personal computer since Thursday morning, thus I haven't blogged. I didn't really feel like doing so from my parents desktop. My Thanksgiving went well, my mom hosted dinner for 12 people. That's a lot of people in our house! Everyone took tons of leftovers home. One of my younger cousins who is attending college in Washington drove down to be with family for the holiday and unfortunately got "snowed in" on Saturday. A nice big storm dropped in on Friday night/Saturday morning and dropped a lot of snow on the pass she had to climb to get out of northern California and into Oregon. Luckily, the storm and the roads cleared for her to safely drive to Washington today.

I did check up on the blogs I follow, I didn't always have time to comment, but I was keeping up. And I was very saddened to see that I lost a follower. I'm having a tough time figuring out exactly who left, but I'm sorry to see them go. I hope I haven't offended them or bored them out of their minds, but I hope they might stop by sometimes and comment. That was definitely not the highlight of my Thanksgiving holiday.

My highlight was getting to hang out with my younger cousin, whom I don't get to see very often. We chat like crazy on Facebook quite often, but we were raised on either side of the US, so we rarely got to see each other. We decided to go see Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (part 1) and thoroughly loved it. I was very happy about this considering the guy who directed it also did Movie 6, and in my humble opinion he fucking ruined it. The whole middle part of the movie was okay, I can handle what they decided to leave out and could understand their reasons why. However, the director screwed up the beginning and the ending enough that I can hardly stand to watch it without getting all pissy. Oddly enough, this same director also directed Movie 5, which I loved. But I digress. If you haven't seen The Deathly Hallows, I highly suggest that you do - you will enjoy it. The downside? I have to wait six more months for part 2 to come out! Oh well.

I also got to spend Saturday shopping in town with my mom and my cousin. We got to enjoy an extra day with her since chains were required on the roads out of town. In every direction except South. We had a fairly lazy afternoon wandering around stores and chatting. Afterward we took dinner to my dad and grandparents as my cousin had been staying with them and my dad had stayed to do stuff around their house while we women went shopping.

By far the biggest thing to happen during the holiday was my announcement. It's now official, although I have yet to talk to my boss and I probably won't until after the first of the year. I don't need her harassment about me leaving her in a lurch and shit for the next two and a half months. I will indeed be moving away from Sacramento come February. I'm waiting until then because I'm on a lease on my apartment until then. I will move to the Middle of Nowhere in the far reaches of Northeast California. To a region that Wal-Mart has probably never heard of. I will be assisting my grandparents with their cattle ranch and their monthly publication. Hopefully I will be able to find a part-time job somewhere so I can have some cash flow.

Believe me when I say, it was not an easy decision. I have agonized over this for over two months. I have shed a lot of tears, even some this past weekend. I'm sure there will be more. I'm scared shitless, but I do hope it's all for the best. I know several of you, my wonderful followers, have commented on previous posts in regards to this decision and you've been so very supportive. My friends, family, and a few of my co-workers have also been supportive of whatever decision I were to make. My family members at dinner were quite shocked about my decision as only 4 people at the table had any idea of what was going on, and that's not including myself. They were all surprised but gave me their support and love and good wishes that everything turn out well. I was highly embarrassed to have to address my entire immediate family, as I don't like being the center attention all that much. Except for my birthday, because well, I'm supposed to be. Most of them had absolutely no idea about anything. Since it was my decision to make, my parents didn't really tell anyone.

I have no idea if I'm making the right move. I have no idea how it will turn out. It scares me to think I will be leaving a job that pays well and offers me benefits and a 401k. I despise the idea of giving notice to my two volunteer gigs as I have grown to love everyone there and the animals involved. It breaks my heart actually. I hate the idea that I may have to draw unemployment in order to have some sort of monthly cash flow. And it's scary to become so dependent on my family for assistance with bills and food until I basically get on my feet.

But I'm not happy where I am. I've never wanted to be a city-dweller; I hate traffic, smog, and the tight-space-living. While I do enjoy some of the things a city offers, like some shopping or large movie theaters, it's not for me. I miss seeing the stars out at night. The city lights dim most of them, but when you're miles and miles away from the lights, the stars truly come out. I've never really wanted to work in a lab. I've enjoyed learning what I have. Believe me when I say, it's something I didn't think I would have been smart enough to do or learn. But it's just not what I ever really wanted to do. My hours make it hard on me. And not only me, my friends and family as well. They never know when to call because they worry they may wake me up. It doesn't help you with a social life. And it definitely seems to be a turn off in the dating world. Seriously, I miss the sun dammit.

I will no longer to have to share walls with people. Or live above or below them. After my move, I will be living a "modular home". Oh fine. Call it a mobile home. A trailer. Fine. But it has its own four walls. Not a single wall is shared with another house. Unfortunately it's stuck in the disco era.  All of my furniture will fit. I just have to get it up there. That ought to be fun. I will be no further from my immediate family than I am now. Instead of an easy freeway drive, they will instead have a mountain drive. Over several mountains. The one thing that pains me, and I've already discussed this with her, is that instead of being an hour and a half away from my best friend, I will instead be an 8 hour drive from her. I burst into tears when I fully realized just how much distance will be between us. She fully understood my concern/fear, but we do have a solid friendship that distance will have a really hard time in separating us. We are truly sisters at heart.

I'm excited at the next chapter of my life. It's scary. So very scary. I will be dropping everything here, and starting over completely. But I have the support of all of my family and friends, and co-workers. Even if I fail miserably, they will still be there for me with open arms and help dust me off. I hope that you, my faithful peeps, will continue to show me support. I have no idea where this blog will go, but rest assured you will get good funny stories about the dumb things I do while learning how to run a ranch. 

I just hope one of those does not involve falling face first into a nice steaming pile of cow shit.